I was like a rabbit after a stick... not a carrot stick... but a "stick" vacuum cleaner. Not any model... but the one advertised online, for Cyber Monday, with the tagline: "How can you not buy this? They're practically giving it away!"
"They," being Walmart.
And "It," being the ionvac ZipVac, 3-in-1, Corded, Stick Vacuum by Tzumi, retail price: $99.97
On sale for J...U...S...T...$20.00!!!
Okay, the price hooked me, but I'd been after a light-weight upright for years now... something manageable that I could easily use to remove small bits of debris from our hardwood and tiled floors, while still leaving the carpeted areas in the bedrooms to my husband, who insists on using "The Beast": a cumbersome and loud industrial canister Shop Vac with a powerful motor, massive filter, and a flexible hose capable of sucking up a small dog.
I did say loud. But should have said LOUD... as in EAR PLUGS REQUIRED, LOUD!
Not so, for the ionvac vacuum whose 5-star reviews mentions the word "Quiet" again and again, along with...
"Awesome Vacuum!"
"Light Weight!"
"Long Cord!"
"Picks Up Everything!"
"Best Purchase I Ever Made!"
"HEPA Filter Included!"
Words that sold me... but my vac wasn't being sold yet. This was only Sunday, not yet Monday.
So... with high hopes of nabbing one... I went online to Walmart's site: set up an account, created a password, logged in, found the item, not yet on sale, and saved the page to my desktop, where at 12:01 AM, officially Cyber Monday, I'd place my order and hope for the best.
With a plan set, I was then set to relax and enjoy Sunday night's televised football game between the Philadelphia Eagles (our home team) and the Green Bay Packers. An exciting game made more exciting, when during a commercial break, an ad for Walmart announced:
"CYBER MONDAY STARTS TODAY, SUNDAY at 7 PM!"
WHOA! And faster than Jalen Hurts (Eagles QB) could throw the ball to A.J. Brown (Eagles WR), I was back at my computer with Walmart's link opened, the ionvac in my cart, and the button marked, PURCHASE, clicked!
TRANSACTION COMPLETE!
YOUR ORDER HAS BEEN PLACED.
YOUR ITEM WILL BE READY FOR PICK UP AFTER 11 AM TOMORROW. (Cyber Monday)
TOUCHDOWN! I SCORED! As did the Eagles, who won the game, while I won a vacuum!
Fast forward to Monday.
Like a kid on Christmas Day, I woke up early with the anticipation of receiving my gift. Later, with my coat on and purse in hand, I headed for the door, when I remembered that I needed to print a copy of my order to take with me.
That's when I saw... a new email from Walmart:
YOUR ITEM IS OUT OF STOCK. YOUR CARD HAS BEEN CREDITED.
WHAT? WhaaaaaaaT?
I no longer felt like the rabbit who snagged the carrot, but more like the comic strip character Charlie Brown, whose football was snatched from under him by Lucy. Only, instead of a football, it was my vacuum... with Walmart doing the snatching.
I WAS PISSED JUST THE SAME.
"Try not to let this ruin your day," said my husband, sympathetically, while knowing he was stating the impossible.
My day WAS ruined, with several more ruined after that, after researching and noticing the ionvac, even at full price, was out-of-stock... EVERYWHERE!
And so... I let the dust settle and moved on. On to other things... like reading, writing, creating, and browsing the internet where one day, on eBay, I found this:
iONVAC ZIPVAC, 3-in-1, CORDED, STICK VACUUM FOR SALE!
NEW! IN ITS ORIGINAL BOX!
FREE SHIPPING!
$30.00!!!!!!
1 LEFT!
Right then, I bought it!
And received it two days later!
That's when, after opening the box and assembling the gray plastic parts, I heard a hum...
Not from my new ionvac quietly gliding along my tiled kitchen floor...
But from ME!... humming this Rolling Stones' song:
Wanted, Needed, and for the price... More Than Expected.
If interested:
Check out these vacuum collectors:
An 11 year-old on 'The Tonight Show' with Jay Leno here:
And a teen on 'This Morning', a British show here.
Watch a vintage Hoover television commercial here.
Take a look at the ionvac ZipVac from Tzumi here.
And as of 1/29/2023, the Eagles are going to The Super Bowl! GO BIRDS!
Watch and listen to 'Fly Eagles Fly' sung by:
The Philadelphia Opera Company here.
The Mummer's South Philadelphia String Band here.
A huge crowd of Eagles fans in front of the Philadelphia Art Museum here.
Watch and listen to the Eagles players record a Christmas album for charity that sold out in 3 minutes and raised $250,000 here. Listen to the complete Christmas album here.
And curious about the slogan "It's a Philly Thing?" Check out the video here.
Here's wishing you & yours...
a
Happy, Healthy, and Prosperous 2023!
and
"May You Always Get What You Need."
From
"Here and Next"
XOX... Dyan
